Just rip my heart out!

Jeff Thompson

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We went for the first of Noah’s 208 trips to the cancer center today. His numbers were as they expected. Horrible for a normal little boy but acceptable for a 6-year-old leukemia patient. His white blood cell counts went from a .5 to a 1.5 so at least that is improving. A normal human being will have a count of 4.5 to 10. His hemoglobin went from 80 down to 50. This also is not great news but not bad considering his condition. We were pleased he was able to come home but the doctors warned that he was in decline. Things would get worse. This afternoon we had an episode or at least a taste of what is to come. After getting up and sitting at the kitchen table Noah tried to eat some Mac & Cheese. He ate about 5 or 6 spoon fulls and said, he was full. After laying back down he started to cry “I’m Nauseous” over and over. As we tried to soothe him he began to vomit and was crying more and more. We were doing everything we could to calm him but felt so helpless to comfort him in any way. While crying he said, “Why is this happening to me?” How can anyone as a parent handle the pure heartache coming from your poor child? I can not even write this without tearing up. This is so hard for Gina and me but the worst is that this is so hard for Noah. I wish I could trade places with him. The emotional hardship is nearly unbearable and we are just starting down this very long road. We will stay strong for Noah and be by his side no matter what comes our way. This will be a very long and tough road for all of us. Noah is simply Amazing!!